Emotionally Unstable

ImageTo say I am emotionally unstable would be an understatement.  I appreciate the comments left in my “Scared” post – I really do.  For a totally stranger to take the time out of their busy day and comment amazes me.  Blowing kisses from afar to the both of you.

With the handful of vitamins and prescription drugs I pop into my mouth every morning – one of them is an anti-depressant.  Though I haven’t been on it long, a month maybe, it doesn’t seem to be making a difference.

Because it is so hard to express myself lately I know it is hard for everyone (however small) to really understand what is happening – what I am going through – how I am feeling.  I don’t even know or understand it myself.

When I had my emotional breakdown yesterday it was in front of SEH and the poor bastard just didn’t know what to do.  I asked him to leave – told him I didn’t want him to see me like this – sent him home to his wife.  In the “real world” I have been working on a letter to SEH.  Sometimes it is easier to express myself by writing and I am hoping this is the case.  I haven’t finished it yet.  Maybe I will work on it today.   In the meantime I am actually dressed and going to run some errands.  I don’t want to.  I would much rather just sit here all day but I need to.  Just the thought of venturing outside and being around people is making feel ill.

Being the true addict that I am – I will pop some none prescribed pills to make it easier.

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