There isn’t a big difference between these two photos. Seriously! I have no one to blame except myself………………..with Monday’s deadline looming and still not having it complete. If I don’t meet the DEADLINE I will FLATLINE – or so it feels. Today is devoted entirely to completing this project even if I have to stay up until Monday. I don’t care (I do care) how many telephone calls I have to make, how many questions I have to get answers to, how many people I have to cry to – it is getting done. Sometimes I feel so stupid – not being able to concentrate – not having a clear enough head to get things done – so stupid. Yet, I am still sitting here waiting for the cobwebs to clear – the A.D.D. medication to kick in so I can hopefully get it done. I feel panic and anxiety but what else is new. I pray to a God I don’t believe it – I make deals with a Devil I don’t believe in. I wish I just had someone to take my hand – to guide me – to show me the way – a life coach? Is that what they are called? A savior? The song, Ramble On by Led Zeppelin keeps playing my head, “Now’s the time – the time is now.”
Waaa Waaa Waaa – bitch bitch bitch – moan moan moan – groan groan groan – blah blah blah – Shit I just need to do it!!!!!!!!