It Is What It Is

9-24-13 6:30 A.M. After not sleeping my day begin.  I experienced a lot of emotions, feelings, tests both phsyical & mental and pain.  Got home around midnight, tossed, turned, cried, tossed, turned, cried and didn’t sleep a wink for the 2nd night in a row.  Today would of normally been “Alarm Clock Wednesday” but I ended up calling and through the tears and sobbing I got the words, “Sorry I can’t make it in” out of my mouth.  Hung up the phone, swallowed two sleeping pills and slept for 3 hours…………………seriously 3 fuckin hours.

The clock had not even struck noontime yet and I was running on 3 hours sleep, my body ached as well as my heart and I struggled just to make myself something to eat.  Spent a little time on the couch and managed to get another hours sleep.  I have not showered, brushed my teeth or dressed and I am still sitting on the couch.

I have not picked up one telephone call nor have I answered one email.  I have not said “It is what it is” once which was my saying of the day the day before.  I will head into my bedroom soon where I will hope a little reading will get me out of my head and the thoughts of my future and hopefully the powers that be will let me sleep this evening.  9-25-13 8:40 P.M.

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7 thoughts on “It Is What It Is

  1. Only three hours on a sleeping pill? You poor thing. My sleep is horrible but at least I have the reprieve of a sleeping pill when I need it. My thoughts go out to you. Have a good night.

  2. I wish you could sleep, I hope that when you rest your dreams are happy and of a time that you want to remember. Thank you for your comments…… I wish there was something more that could be done other than just pixalated words on a computer screen. I usually count very clean sheep… LOL… I won’t press like on this post as it seems odd to like the fact that someone hasn’t slept in two days and who gets no help from sleeping pills… But I do sympathize…
    Try and rest

    • I have taken a pill over 90 minutes ago. It is now 11:04 pm and i am still very much awake. I can not function properly without sleep…..noone can. I did lol at the clean sheep…..thank you for bringing a smile to my face.

  3. I pray that you get the rest you need and the comfort you seek. I’m sorry you are having such a difficult time. ❤

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